Tuesday, March 31, 2009

It's My Party

Here's another of those wonderful old posters, I can almost imagine that's me in the jaunty hat and gloves.

My current/former employer continues to play games, apparently thinking that the contradictory statements they keep throwing out about me to various people inside and outside the company (and I use the term "contradictory statements" well-advisedly) won't get back to me. Just because I don't have access to my company email anymore doesn't mean I'm totally out of the loop.

I feel like I've gotten through the worst of this, I can stand to have the sling taken off, my shirt changed and the sling put back on without feeling like I am going to pass out. However, I am extremely emotional and end up in tears at least once a day. There seems to be two sides to everything these days. I can now sleep for 6 hours without waking up, but when I do, I wake up in considerable pain. For the next few days I'm going to set an alarm for 3 hours from lights out to try to avoid this...pain is no way to start the day.

I am not a patient person, which makes me a terrible patient. I wonder how those two very different meanings can fit inside the same word.

Here's a partial list of things I cannot do -- right now:
  • lie down
  • cut meat
  • open a pill bottle
  • groom, tack or ride my horse
  • blow dry my hair
  • walk for any distance
  • fold laundry

And, because I'm really trying here, a partial list of things I can do -- right now:

  • drive my car (with extra care and caution)
  • wash my face and brush my teeth
  • work the computer mouse and type with one finger
  • put in my contacts (this takes patience but is possible)
  • make coffee and tea
  • grow beautiful long fingernails
  • sing along with my favorite tunes, off-key and unapolegetic

Miss gets her teeth floated on Thursday, she's overdue for her yearly appointment. It's been apparent for a while that her mouth has been bothering her, even in a hackamore she's been fighting me and throwing her head around for a month or so. No doubt this contributed to her pissy mood 2 weeks ago when she walked away from the mounting block. (Very painful) lesson learned: sometimes saving money by postponing necessary vet work turns out to be a very bad idea.


  1. hi donna! Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you!

  2. Donna, I'll be thinking of you, geez, those are some bruises! Mend quickly and well [heart to the sky!!!] Sue C

  3. You amaze me with your strength right now. The crying is not unusual at all considering the amount of physical and emotional pain you are under. I find it inspiring that you can still blog, comment and continue to look for bright spots in your day. Honestly, you are so strong that you are my hero right now! Truly!

    The rest of the healing and getting back on the horse and job will take time. I would be impatient too if I were you but hang in there.

    Oh, and I loved the part about singing unapologetically off-key. That's the spirit! :)

  4. Good girl!! So glad to hear that you're feeling somewhat better and getting stronger. Hmmm, beautiful long fingernails huh? That's something I haven't had in a very long time. Enjoy them while you can. :)
    Being emotional and very impatient describes me to a "T". I make a lousy patient too. I completely understand. Sometimes I go out in the barn and cry and yell and scream just to blow off steam - it actually helps. Then I get to laughing at how ridiculous I must look, and start to worry that maybe the neighbors can hear me, or God forbid...could be watching!! Then I really start laughing. People would no doubt have be securely and very tidily sequestered away in a safe and padded room...but you're the only one I'm telling my story to, because I think you'll understand.
    See...there's a little crazy in all of us. Honey, I think you're doing splendidly, considering the circumstances.

  5. You sound like you are healing inside and out. By the time you get back up on Miss her pissy mood and your bum arm will all be a fading memory.

    There are other flavors of ice cream that can bring total comfort.

  6. I do hope that you are on the mend, and that your pain relief is better. Those certainly are some colourful bruises!

  7. "sometimes saving money by postponing necessary vet work turns out to be a very bad idea"
    Can I quote ya on that babe?
    Glad you are recovering, in the meantime take it EASY on yourself!

  8. I read through the list of things you cannot do and thought, wow, that is really rough!

    Then I came to the good part, I mean really, really impressive part ... about your typing your post with one finger, and that includes adding a photo.

    Not a patient person? I think you are incredible!

    Speedy recovery!